STEW GONE WRONG

            "If I have to do just one more," like butter in summer suffering meltdown on the Stew Gone Wrong Saloon parking lot, KJLU reporter Creme Brulee sizzled, "do just one more, just one more dive of a diner interview; I am forsaking Fort Worth, retiring to New Orleans, and changing my name to Creme Fraiche."

            Too late frantic waving of camera crew alerted Creme to live on air status.

            "Or to Mud, just call me Mud Slide.  No doubt this is viral bound," quake of Creme rumbled aftershock, then switched gears, tried to salvage ruins with loony toon smile. "Only funnin' folks, KJLU reporter Creme Brulee here and I cannot wait to meet home town celebrity Bad Stewie, owner and head cook of the historic old west, bullet riddled, Stew Gone Wrong Saloon." Camera a follow, her shoes crunched gravel as she walked past parking lot front row of pickup trucks, old clunkers and bookoodles of motorcycles.  Creme turned head, beckoned with hand, "Come, follow if you dare..."

            And there Creme stood, face to face with iron clad brace, a riveted iron cross, upon an old saloon's crusty old door.  She reached out, grasped handle of palm shined brass, opened door to guts of past, the Stew Gone Wrong Saloon.

            Stepping thru threshold, Creme stepped right in that name called Mud, "Oh boy!" She cringed at what she feared to be her very own, spitten on, image.  For there she was live and in person on 120 inch full color TV.

            But what was this, instead of lynching party, diner patrons tried to play nice, many struggled to stifle, even hide snickers with hand over mouth; for after all, most had been there, that place called foot in mouth. But then jarringly and suddenly...

            Thru swinging kitchen doors a paw waving, bear sized Bad Stewie bounded out, cued crowd to shout, "Howdy Miss Creme!!"

            Bad Stewie grabbed her up, bestowed his signature bear hug, near squeezed the sauce right out of Creme. "Let not too far... turn too late..." Stewie whispered in Creme's ear.  He kissed that ear.

            Creme's legs near gave out.  Stewie held her fast, kept her from falling, said, "Need a chair Miss Creme?  You seem a tad frazzled." And yes, her blond hair was a bit frazzled, as her eyes melted into his.

            Some of the diner crowd gave wink, amid a united sigh.

            The camera guy, er gal, Lisa, whispered, "Now this is live TV. Good stuff!" She thumbs upped crew tech behind her.

            Was it embarrassment, was it the bear hug squeeze, or maybe the kiss on ear; just what was it that left Creme, a seasoned reporter, a master communicator, and one hot chick to boot... left her without words?

            "Are you okay, Miss Creme?" Stewie feared he'd squeezed a tad too hard, maybe even broke her.

            "I'm," Creme near lost grip on microphone,  as she rested palms gainst Bad Stewie teddy bear chest, "I'm... its just your hair took me off guard." Her lips lied, but her green eyes hid not her heart. "Why did you dye it all those colors?" She steered diversion, even managed segue to interview.

            "Well," Bad Stewie with gentle paw to the small of her back ushered Creme's tail feathers into bar stool nest.  He plopped down on stool beside her, "well, the hair is like for real."

            "What? You are kidding me, right? No young man has splotchy black, gray, green, firey red and purple natural hair." She reached out, combed it thru fingers. "Its so soft." She whispered.

            Big Bad Stewie blushed. "I didn't say natural." Stewie smiled, "I said for real quite unatural."

            "But is not your hair one of the reasons why locals and the media call you Bad Stewie?" She pried.

            "That and here at the Stew Gone Wrong Saloon, we make the best rabid hasenpfeffer in Texas." Stewie gave his diner and cuisine plug.

            "Okay, hype guy, the stew is good, but what about the hair?" Creme sensed personal interest hook.

            The hair is sort a personal,"Stewie stalled, yet sighed, "but near all here already know I was just a kid when I caught that evil upon my head.  Doctors thought it a rare fungus, probably from the Holsteins I milked every morning on the ranch. Anyhow, no medicine they had at the time cured it, so they decided radiation the answer."

            "They used radiation on your head? How horrible!" Creme lay hand on his massive forearm, added, "Sort a puts one's own petty rumblings in perspective."

            "Yeah, I'm a bit older than you might think.  Back then the docs tended to use radiation a rad too much.  I still remember my hair falling out by the roots, the kids at school teasing, my violent retaliation, and then," Stewie sighed, gave shoulder shrug, smiled wide, "then it grew back out... rainbow colored."

            "They hurt you." Concern flooded green eyes.

            "Had head aches for years, then one day the Lord just made them disappear." Stewie nodded matter of factly, tilted head face upward, and gave a big ol', "Thank you Father God, in Jesus name."

            "The LORD," many at diner tables repeated, some amened, many more nodded.

            "That was unexpected." Wondering set astir, Creme took notice of amening patrons. The camera followed her eyes, panned the crowd of old and of young, of dads, moms and children, of Fort Worth cowboys, warehouse and railroad crew workers, and bookoodles of leather clad tattooed bikers, and... "Oh my,"Creme near gasped, "a table full of lawyers and paralegals, and is that an agent of the IRS?" But then she, and camera, and all of live TV watching saw the crosses round necks and studded in silver on black leather jackets; saw the Jesus T-shirts, and even... even was it... did they all wear the light...

            "But this is an old saloon." Creme understood not. "These people are all, well, all from the rough side of the tracks. How can this be?"

            "Not all that's added... is a plus," Stewie spoke heart. "Ever since the Eve of sin, Adam and the rest of us, we all got our minuses. But as recorded in Mark 2:17, when Jesus was criticized for attending a dinner party full of disreputable folks at a tax collectors home, he told his critics that he came not for those who think themselves righteous, but for those who know they are sinners; for those who are healthy have no need of a physician, but those who are sick do.  And so it is that thru Jesus... God's grace... our past of day... is cast ago away... When we love Jesus, the Son of God, we love his Father, and we become God's children also. So are... the once rough crowd forgiven and blessed."

            And Creme Brulee, a once tad too driven professional reporter, lay her head gainst a once bad Stewie's bear of a chest.  And she confessed, as she wept, the name of the one and the only true Word... "Jesus."

            "Grace to the neck... the gift of light to the soul... Jesus..." said the saved from the bad, Stuart B. Bruin, as he hugged her and with gentle paw patted the nape of the neck of Creme Brulee... three little pats at a time...

            And the diners at tables let out a collective sigh of pure joy, punctuated with an amen blessing here and there...  

            And Lisa the cameraman, er camera lady, smiled, then said, "Now that's what I call live TV.  Good stuff!" She thumbs upped to heaven.

John 8:12 KJ: Jesus, "I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life." (John 1:1-14)

That most important decision of any life... might better make it now... for the never too late... tread not a moment too soon...

(This has been but a humble parable pointing to Biblical teaching. The true stories of the Holy Bible are infinitely more awesome. Crack one open. Let your life be awesome.) (For a true story bout stew in the Bible see Jacob & Esau in Genesis.)

Stew Gone Wrong? What to do? 2nd Chronicles 7:14...  



                                           

                     

EVERY PIE HAS ITS CRUST

            "Kneading dough is no piece of cake." With full lips a pout, Terra Eskew puffed at scrunchie escaped dark hair.

            "That's," Smitten Kitchens laugh swished her palomino pony tail, "that's because cake be doughless.  I think to bake the cake takes, like, batter?"

            "Exactly," Terra agreed, "doughless, unlike making pie crust, like we are doughing," Terra chuckled at her little play on words, but added, "Just how did we inherit the unofficial family title of Thanksgiving pie makers?" With back of hand Terra dabbed at the salty dew of labor on her nose, but succeeded only in covering her freckles in white flour.

            As she prepared apple filling, Smitten smiled, contemplated not telling Terra, but, "You look so cute with snow capped nose."

            "What?" Terra's brown eyes crossed, fought to focus on tip of nose. "So you are saying my nose is like a snow capped mountain?"

            Smitten giggle vibrated her far more than a tad baby bump gainst counter. "Hold still, silly," Smitten took a break from carving apples.  Her green eyes a sparkle reflected, told the tale of care, the red and white checkered apron borne by right hand, as she reached up to dab flour from Terra nose.

            "That's my Smitten, been keeping your too tall gal pal's nose clean since third grade." Terra pounded dough.

            "Little rough on the dough aren't we there, Terra?" Smitten knew. She was not supposed to know, but she knew that Terra look, that dough of guilt, that forbidden apple pie that ate at the heart of Terra.  Thus Smitten with slip of lip swept up the past, "From the floor of the mind... stir wisps of dust... whispers of time..." That breath, oh how it breathed Smitten heart; yet she sucked air back in thru teeth, bit that lowered lip, too late to retrieve words born.

            Terra mirrored Smitten bite of lower lip, then whispered, "The slip of the tongue is seldom silk, nor without season." She sprinkled white flour over dough, rubbed flour on rolling pin, and rolled not so merrily along.

            "Nobody's perfect." To bowl of carved apples, Smitten added smidgen of allspice, yet now the herb of rub.

            Trembling lip the quiet of Terra betrayed.

            "Sorry." Wrinkled brow of Smitten winced.

            After a tad more quiet, Terra ceased rolling of sour dough. "So you know," she whispered.

            Twas Smitten turn to weigh the quiet, a quiet that echoed off rue mountain.

            "We didn't plan it." Terra closed shades of eyes. "It," she took breath, opened eyes, and with those full pout lips sighed, "it just happened."

            "Yeah," thru apron Smitten rubbed pregnant tummy, "stuff happens."

            "I am so sorry," Terra put her hand over Smitten's on her swollen tummy.

            "I am sorry too." Smitten stared out kitchen window into the garden beyond.

            "Please," Terra fought lump in throat, "forgive me?" Terra cried. She hugged her precious friend, patted Smitten hand atop Smitten's ripe tummy. "At least you and Bill made up after our combined stupidity."

            Smitten hesitated, then as if they played a game of their youth, she put her hand atop Terra's hand, that was atop her hand on her rounded tummy, then said, "About this," Smitten pressed Terra's hand from atop hers directly to pregnant tummy, "I hate to one up you, but, when the smitten smite back, revenge is stupider to the nth degree."

            "You and my Ted?" Terra blinked, squished tears down cheek.

            "High fidelity infidelity sort a amps up the heartache, doesn't it." Smitten stared all the more out kitchen window into the garden.

            "Every pie has its crust..." Terra cried.  Her eyes followed Smitten's thru kitchen window, thru tears she asked, "Is forgiveness out there... in the garden?"

            "In the garden I see the well of grace... the living water... his name is Jesus..." Smitten cried...

            And so it came to pass... in the garden... they prayed...

            That very evening... baby Grace was born...


Our characters take a bow:

Terra Eskew: the earth, the world askew.

Smitten: When the smitten smite back... consequences swell...

Every Pie Has Its Crust: since Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit...

Yet read in the totally true and infinitely awesomer Holy Bible:

            John 4:5-42, The adulteress at the endless well of grace... Jesus...

            John 8:1-11,  The woman about to be stoned for adultery... Jesus tells her accusers: "Let ye without sin cast the first stone..."

            Luke 23:34, Nailed to the cross, Jesus prayed for us all, "Father forgive them, for they know not what they do." So must we forgive also...

The most important decision of any life:

            Romans 3:23 KJ; "For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God."

            Romans 5:8  KJ; "But God comendeth his love toward us, in that, while we yet sinners, Christ died for us."

            Romans 6:23 KJ; "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

            Romans 10:9 KJ; "That if thou shalt confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God has raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved."

                                         ... ... ... You are loved ... ... ...